Turns out that all those

Turns out that all those "your computer needs ventilation" comments are actually true. My internet connection was fine; the modem was kaput. I had the modem underneath my wireless router, and it got hot, and that may be the reason it conked out. So I get to pay $159, $99 for a new modem and $59 for the guy to take 5 minutes to set it up, which I probably could have done myself. Sigh.

I am feeling too stupid for today's technology.